I wonder if this anger that you show when you write about her, if it is showing when you interact with her in any given moment.
You seems to accept that this is the attitude for a WAS and yet it drives you bananas.
I hope you wait a few hours or a day to answer every single time she sticks the knife on your chest. Don't read too much on what she is saying or doing. Give some time, be patient and just keep your boundaries tight, so she won't hurt you all the time.
Think about what is best in this situation, if you go together you have a chance to show you have been changing and is somewhat detached from her. If you go separate, then you can rest and take it easy, because you don't need to feel uncomfortable all the time.
