To start in this (it's getting old) sorry tale

[Wonka]

GB,

I think you've come down on 25 TOO HARD. I get that you've been burned by your W's A and feel strongly about your position on exposure.

What I see here is that 25 is sharing some perspectives from others on the other side in the FB story. She was simply relaying how people reacted to the betrayed wife's post. If 25 had deleted any of the negative comments, then 25 would have been accused of being draconic in controlling the page. As with any FB postings, there will be negative posts.

For me personally, I am not in favor of exposure because the underlying premise is shaming the WAS into returning back to the M. Shaming a person and setting personal boundaries are two separate things. That is my position and I stand firmly by it.

I take issue with this comment:

If I recall right, 25years had a emotional affair on her husband many years before that she's never disclosed or revealed to her husband and she had several affairs after they separated (her husband abandoned her so I may empathize a bit; but, I also understand her not wanting to run around town talking about/exposing her behavior). Her feelings about exposure should be understood in that light.

So what?! That does not negate 25's value here as a poster and contributor. She made the choice not to disclose the EA to her H for her own personal reasons. Guess what? They're still married. You're making it sound like she had some scarlet letter on her head...oh wait. You're trying to brand her with the "A" on her backside so you can feel smug and superior. How charming.

I am going to step aside and let 25 answer for herself.

Bottom line, I think you were too harsh here with 25. Not cool.

[raliced]

Hi 25. Thanks for stopping in. How do I get access to a DB coach in the UK? Not sure if you can answer that or not. I've looked and although people DO manage it I can't see how to go about this.

Hi NDY- I don't see where anyone answered this for you - You might stop by Old Dogs thread and ask how he did this - I believe he mentioned once that he Skypes with his DB coach from the UK.

[NDY]

Hi raliced. That's the one. Thanks for the reminder. I will go there and ask.

[Cadet]

I am going to step aside and let 25 answer for herself.

I think that is a good idea, for all the meta discussion to step aside.
Lets find a way to help NDY without this discussion.

Thanks for everyones cooperation in this matter.

[PigPen]

Hi 25. Thanks for stopping in. How do I get access to a DB coach in the UK? Not sure if you can answer that or not. I've looked and although people DO manage it I can't see how to go about this.

Hi NDY- I don't see where anyone answered this for you - You might stop by Old Dogs thread and ask how he did this - I believe he mentioned once that he Skypes with his DB coach from the UK.

Hi NDY,

I was out of the US and Skyped with my DB coach. Using the phone on Skype internationally was something like two cents a minute and worked better than the internet way of Skyping.

It's doable and not much more hassle.

PP

[NDY]

Hi again.

Yea, the coaching. As much as I would love to do that its out of my price range.

[NDY]

New Thread

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2574697#Post2574697

[25yearsmlc]

GB,

I think you've come down on 25 TOO HARD. I get that you've been burned by your W's A and feel strongly about your position on exposure.

What I see here is that 25 is sharing some perspectives from others on the other side in the FB story. She was simply relaying how people reacted to the betrayed wife's post. If 25 had deleted any of the negative comments, then 25 would have been accused of being draconic in controlling the page. As with any FB postings, there will be negative posts.

For me personally, I am not in favor of exposure because the underlying premise is shaming the WAS into returning back to the M. Shaming a person and setting personal boundaries are two separate things. That is my position and I stand firmly by it.

I take issue with this comment:

[quote=Georgia Bulldogs] If I recall right, 25years had a emotional affair on her husband many years before that she's never disclosed or revealed to her husband and she had several affairs after they separated (her husband abandoned her so I may empathize a bit; but, I also understand her not wanting to run around town talking about/exposing her behavior). Her feelings about exposure should be understood in that light.

THIS^^ is false. It's a LIE. Please stop saying this.

I came here and shared a profoundly embarrassing moment of weakness in which I ALMOST had an emotional affair 22 years ago

which I worked out with an Army Chaplain

(I was in Desert Storm then, btw, and a continent and ocean away from my h and children),

and [i] I never had anything close to any type of A, ever again.

You did me a great disservice in recklessly spreading that lie.

Your spin on the fb page is also wildly inaccurate. I mean, WOW.

However, I'm too angry to write anymore.

And I think MWD said it well enough anyhow.