Well, the meeting with L went well today. She reassured me that I could expect 50% at least with D2, which is my priority at this point. I also asked her about various scenarios pertaining to D2, visitation, what we can and can't do together (more importantly, how W can control this, or not control this, etc.)
I think while I was sitting there, I realized one important thing - I'm not ready to file yet. I'm not ready to give up. I don't know how much more time I can give it - I know some have gone through it for years, but I'm think more like 30-60 days and then just tell her I can't deal with it anymore.
This is so hard, as all of you know. You have all been such a source of strength and advice - even just reading the other threads but not being directly involved. Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to send a word of encouragement as I adjust to the "new reality".
I'm still trying to be detached - but I keep running into things that make me so angry and start thinking about everything that is going on that makes me even angrier.
Right now, I feel as though God has abandoned me. That's the hardest feeling of all.
