Not Confused...Insane in the Membrane

[job]

I'm so sorry to hear that things are still quite stressful for you. No, the divorce won't be the end of it for quite some time, if ever. You have children together and no matter what you do, you will still have some connection because of graduations, marriages, grandchildren etc.

If your xh is anything like my xh, it will take 2-3 years, if then, for him to settle down and his focus will be on the ow or on something else. He's angry because nothing is turning out the way he thought it would. He's angry because you are going on w/your life and he no longer has control over you.

You've pressed charges against him for the damage to your car. Are sure he did it? He may have manipulated one of the kids to do it for him as a way of getting back at you. Now, about the restraining order...it's only a piece of paper and it may push him to go to another level of being nasty. Sometimes when we file for one, it just stirs the pot even more. Since he's acting like a bull in a china closet, you will need to watch your back. I'm not trying to scare you, but point out just how angry these crisis people can get and when they can't get their way, they can do some pretty nasty stuff.

As for the children, I'm so sorry to read that they've turned against you...but in time, that may change. All you can do is let them go and figure things out for themselves. I do hope and pray that they will see the light and come to realize that you were there for them and that their father is the one that went off the rails.

BRNR, it's okay to be angry, let it out. Do what you need to do to protect yourself. Give yourself a pat on the back because you've been a lady showing dignity and grace throughout all of this and he's still looking like an @sshole after all of this time.

Again, I am so sorry to read what he's done. Please, please take care of yourself and be careful when dealing w/him.