I do admit that the more I or anyone interacts with other, the closer it CAN get towards that, but doesn't have to.
Again, while I'm not advocating relationships or sex, why couldn't these interactions be useful in helping me with PMA, detaching and being upbeat around ww?
I understand what you and Vapo were trying to get at, and it does make sense. The problem with using those interactions with woman as a GAL activity is that they are filling an emotional need of yours. You say it doesn't have to go too far and maybe it wont. However, once you begin taking those baby steps to that good feeling each next step is easier and easier.
This is exactly what happens with our WW's. Emotional need not met, find someone who meets it. Justify baby steps because they make you "feel good and nothing wrong with it". Before you know it you're in a place doing things you never expected. Its easy to justify any action when deep down it makes you feel good. I believe all of us are capable of much more than we realize when we are faced with pain and unmet needs. Its just human nature.
The holding on and how long is a question each person needs to ask. For me I know I'm not ready for a new relationship and might not be for years. So I question my true motives, am I just in pain and want it to be over? For me that would be the wrong reason to move on.
You admit you aren't ready for a new relationship, so why try to close this door right now? You can still move forward with your life without starting a new relationship or . What motive is there for moving on fully unless its just about detaching and not hurting anymore.
Detaching is letting someone live the way they want without it effecting/controlling you. Moving on/letting go fully of someone because you feel its holding back your detachment is backwards. We detach to be able to not let those feelings control us, but that's exactly what you would be doing.
I understand what you were saying about detachment and hope, but don't confuse detaching and holding onto love. You can be detached and still love, still have hope. Its just a very difficult process that takes time, and we may never be fully detached, which is fine. The point is to be able to manage your emotions in a healthy way.
Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be
