Wayward Wife & LRT (5)

[Defacto]

However, I also don't think that one just wakes up one morning and is completely detached. Like everything, it's a journey and I feel I'm taking baby steps towards that goal.

I am going to challenge you here, as others like Mozza and Caliguy have challenged me. I hope you appreciate it as I have.

I agree that detaching is hard, but is it a journey? Really? If you are partially detached, are you detached at all? Is there such a thing as being partially pregnant? Some days I am detached, and others I am not. There is no in-between. detaching is an act. Accepting that you are detached, or being comfortable with being detached, or becoming good/consistent at detaching, that is a journey. You may think I am splitting hairs, but by calling your detachment a journey, something to ease into, I think you are rationalizing your inability to detach. Ask yourself: By permitting yourself to take it slower, are you not sabotaging your efforts at detaching, thereby hindering the process?

Ultimately, you can do whatever you choose. You don't have to detach if you don't want to or don't think it will help, but don't kid yourself and say you are detaching if you are not.

Just some food for thought. now think!

Stay strong, friend.

RAI

RAI,
Thanks again for the attention to my sitch. I live for theoretical discussions, especially those in which I have no qualifications to engage in LOL.

I don't think you can compare the physical, like being pregnant, with the psychological, like detachment. I believe it is possible to be on a journey to detachment, same as one can journey from adolescence into adulthood.

Nonetheless, I think you bring up a solid point in which can all utilize to self evaluate. Thanks! If we catch ourselves in a behavior that shows non-detachment (like my interaction with STBX this morning), we need to check ourselves and question, re-evaluate, and correct our level of detachment.