Ripken - WW filed for divorce and I'm moved out #4

[Ripken8]

That's EXACTLY what I'm asking about, Vapo. You say "GAL and detach. Don't worry about her". That only goes so far. I have been working on myself since BEFORE bomb drop, going on more than 6 months. Also, I'm not whoring around or looking for cheap hookups or serious relationships.

The problem with detaching is it seems impossible to have it both ways. If I detach and "be the lighthouse", I'm spending that time with expectations (that I shouldn't have) hoping that there is a CHANCE that it could make our relationship better down the road and that would be worth it to do so.

If I detach and "don't worry about her and GAL" I'm subject to meeting new people and having new connections. Getting self-esteem boosts from realizing there are people out there who like me for me. But, I don't act on any of that.

So, how do I do either, without feeling lonely or hurt or stuck? Detach and be the lighthouse with or without her OR detach, make connections and never act. Doesn't really seem that possible.