Oh, no... frown That is awful. Disrespectful and ... Just incredibly disrespectful. And hurtful.

Your boundaries are yours. Everything you do is your choice. I know there are many who feel I should have kicked H out after I found out about the A - they had different boundaries. I know it took H by complete surprise that I very quickly said I wanted to work on our M.

Could it be that H wants you to take the responsibility for separating? That he's trying to get a reaction out of you? I have told H a few times when it comes up (he'll exclaim "this is it, this is why we should split") that he is free to leave, find another place to live, at any time. Door is right there. But he can't bait me into telling him it's over.

I guess that if H had taken up with OW again, in or outside our home, I would have told him *he* made the choice to leave, with his actions.

M 16 yrs, WH62, P54
3 adult blended kids
EA 11/13, BD1 6/14
PA fall 14, BD2 2/15
Piecing 2015, BD3 12/15
Separated 4/16
WH moved OW in 5/16
Divorced 6/15/17