Sounds like she's testing and wanting control back. Wanting to make sure you are still there.
I'd keep it short. Maybe something like:
"Sorry, I've been busy. If there's an emergency regarding the kids, I'd want you to call/text me. I'll make myself available when it concerns them."
I agree. If she had an actual emergency, she would've let me know.
I dig your text edits. However, I don't want to apologize for being busy. I have considered not giving her any explanation there too.
Here's what I got now: "Hi. I've been super busy. If there is an emergency with the kids, please call or text me. I'll make myself available when it concerns them."
I would simply TM back asking her if there was an emergency you are more than available .. otherwise do not expect a rapid response as you now have a new life (not one you asked for) and will do the best you can to move on.
Just finished up with my DB coach. At first, it felt like she was trying to steer me away from going darker. But, after talking through it a bit, she agreed with my approach. No major breakthroughs, just encouragement and some role plays, for when STBX brings everything up.
After my coaching, I sent STBX my revised text:
Hi. I've been super busy. If there is an emergency with the kids, please call or text me. I'll make myself available when it concerns them.
It definitely feels good to get the boundary out there.
Me:35 W:30 D:4 S:1 Bomb: 01/08/15, discovered EA & PA In House Separation: 01/14/15 W moves out: 04/05/15 I tell OM's W about A: 04/15/15 W serves D papers: 06/19/15 Mediation: 09/16/15 D final: 12/01/15