first post; my story

[Matt777]

Keep your chin up, Kembo.
Filing is just one step in a long process. I know it [censored], but it isn't the end.
Never give up hope, even in the darkest times.

[Kembo05]

Thanks Matt. I think she is just running. She even said she knows this won't make her happier immediately. She justified it by saying she has been letting people tell her what to do and what not to do her whole life and she isn't doing that anymore. She also said what we are doing isn't healthy for our D2, she said it will be better for her in the long run.

[Kembo05]

but yes, it [censored]. and im just kind of like what do I do now?

[Matt777]

Lucky for you, The D process IS a long run. That's why there are cool down periods, especially with little kids in the picture. It's OBVIOUSLY not best for your kid for you guys to D.

So use the time now to work on Kembo. Then when she realizes she doesn't want the D anymore, she will encounter s Kembo 2.0 that she can fall in love with again.

[NDY]

but yes, it [censored]. and im just kind of like what do I do now?

you slap on your happy face and DB. Work on you. Forget this incident. We all have something that sets us back and this is just one of yours. Get back on the horse. I don't hear any fat ladies singing.
Peace

[Kembo05]

Ironically I ordered the DB book today. I'm going to read that one real quick when it shows up.

I know this isn't what she wants, we have made some progress but we have the one setback and she just throws in her towel.

[Matt777]

Filing for divorce is just that. It means in 6-??? Months, you'll be divorced.....if she still wants it then. That's a LONG time.

As NDY said, get to work on you. Forget about the OM and work on YOU. Also, you can't let your emotions get the best of you - be the lighthouse.

[Fogg]

From what I've seen on here, D either happens very quickly or it ends up being dragged out a long time. In my state its a 6 month waiting period after its been filed with small children. W tried to get the paperwork started in Jan, then things fell through and I think shes just let it go for now. Even if the D is finalized it doesn't mean things are done, you decide when that happens. Don't let that piece of paper change what your doing now.

[Kembo05]

its been 105 days since I found out about the A and it says once D is filed its a minimum of 90 days with children involved.

She is acting on 100% emotion right now. Dang, I wish I would have ordered the DB book sooner.

I know things were improving and she admitted it too. Any setback we have she just has to run further and further away. We had a setback 3 weeks ago and that is when she contacted the attorney to just get info, we have a setback yesterday and that pushes her to meet with attorney and then file for D

[NDY]

its been 105 days since I found out about the A and it says once D is filed its a minimum of 90 days with children involved.

She is acting on 100% emotion right now. Dang, I wish I would have ordered the DB book sooner.

I know things were improving and she admitted it too. Any setback we have she just has to run further and further away. We had a setback 3 weeks ago and that is when she contacted the attorney to just get info, we have a setback yesterday and that pushes her to meet with attorney and then file for D

Dude. We have a saying here in Scotland. Chillax (chill and relax). Big scary statements like D and filing are put in front of us for a reason, and it ain't the reason you think. Stay with the plan. Do what the experts here say. Just two weeks ago my WW was spewing on my face about D and selling up. Now? Nada. I've spent a long time today thinking about detaching and what that means. These threads hold the secrete. We can do this.