Yup Cac . . . . we've already figured out about the SSRI's. Paxil was the first one and it just assassinated her drive. After I howled enough she got off that but thats been about 9 months ago. Its a pain management drug that I think is doing it now, but after this weekend she said she wants the doctor to take her off of it too since she thinks that its the problem now. We'll see.
The despair is the worst part you know? Its like being hit in the gut everytime I hear "no, not now, I can't" everytime I try to initiate something. Its to the point where I've given up. I can't even really say that I have the desire anymore to have a go even if she wanted to. Its just so hard to put into words how badly it feels. And the worst part is that the cause of the pain is the one person who you would most likely turn to for comfort if the source of despair were anything else. There just is no outlet for the feelings in these situations.
