It's also possible that she's p*ssed if what you suspect is true and that is that OM dropped her. So she may be thinking "Great, OM has dumped me and now Thriver is proving to be not the uncaring, non-understanding monster I thought he was and I'm too far down the divorce path now!" and she's freaking out.
As Cadet said, best to remain calm and just continue to DB. You have to demonstrate (even if just for yourself) that your changes are real, and the added bonus is that your wife WILL notice that.
