Bright - sorry you are having these feelings. May I suggest that you google and read up on sociopaths? I believe that many MLCers become sociopathic in their behaviours. And one of the things you end up feeling is a fool for caring.
Your friends know nothing about what is going on and what has gone on. And frankly they do not sound very supportive. By all means divorce if it is what you want, but do it when you are ready.
Please do not blame yourself for the fact that another person is callous and cruel. But do not have people like that in your life. There are a lot of really nice people out there.
It is our misfortune to have fallen in love with people who turned out eventually to have the emotional depth of a fried egg (and that is probably unfair on the egg).
There is a lot of talk here on 'working on ourselves' and while I do not deny its value, actually we did not cause another person to behave like a real a**hole. The main thing we need to learn is to walk away as long as they persist in behaving like this.
If and when they realise they have lost something valuable (as opposed to something useful!) they will find us and try and make amends. Hugs. I think you sound like a really nice person who deserves so much more in life
