Hi Teach. I am so sorry that you are on here, but it is the absolute best place to be! It's okay to feel out of control and sad. I too have been with my H for 23 years and he, out of the blue, said that he wasn't happy.
It takes patience and the willingness to reach out for support. That was very difficult for me in the beginning because I tend to be a private person. I've learned my journey is a lot easier because I have the people on here.
Just make sure that when you talk to him, that you keep a PMA and with your children, just reassure them that no matter what, THEY will be okay.
*hugs* E
M 46 / H 43 T 24/M 18 S 4 11/6/2014 ILYBNILWY 1/16/2015 Living in separate bedroom 1/8/2016 H moved out