It's so hard. I'm getting myself clean, getting back to what I used to be. And all I can think is that I really just want my W. All the little stuff didn't matter, I chose to hide everything out of fear and shame and no self esteem. I literally had no life with her though. I let myself get so caught up in everything she did, and I just let myself go, I wasn't important and I wasn't good enough. How sad, to realize that. And then to realize there ain't a damn thing to do about it, but move on.
