Saw my IC today, she's really really good. I get a real sense of empathy from her and she makes me feel pretty comfortable.
I told her how my WW believes that I am a narcissist. That I have fooled my friends of 3 decades and my own mother. She indicated that in her 25 years of counseling and dealing with sociopaths at Canada's largest mental health institution, I am not one for sure. LOL.
She's proud that I meditate and how reflective I have become. She says it can have a positive impact on the health. We both agreed that we can't understand how others live without it. She told me a story where meditation saved her from a very rough patch in her life. She was skeptical at first as she thought it might be some new age thing.
She told me that it is okay to "look" at other women. I said I wasn't anywhere near ready for a relationship. But "looking" is perfectly normal.
She worries about how I am living under the same roof as my WW while she is seeing OM. She says it must be hell. I agree but I told her there is nothing I can do about it and how I have worked on acceptance. She gave me a book for free on getting over a loss in M. I was really appreciative.
She wants me to protect myself legally from my WW. And I am to report to her about what my lawyer has to say. She has been really encouraging. My WW has been piling on debt and cashing in on her retirement.
She asked me some questions about my WW's mood. She wondered if she was bipolar. I have no idea, I don't know any of that stuff. She has been very adamant on not bad mouthing WW to my boys. Even though our parenting styles are different, I should not countermand her authority in front of them. I agreed and I don't do that. Of course does my WW do the same? NO. I told her that my boys love their mom and that's a beautiful thing. I'm not going to interfere with that.
I get coverage from work on these things but only for a few. But she told me that I can do something to continue these sessions for next to nothing. Don't tell anyone. I get the impression that she wants me to keep seeing her. That really touched me.
All in all, I feel really positive afterwards but a little sad. She says that I am doing well in expressing my emotions during this whole thing and that I am a thoughtful person. She says it's okay to be angry. Anger can get us moving.
I told her that I am not innocent in this whole thing. She listened and affirmed but I feel she's more interested in me getting through this limbo hell in one piece and getting on with my life.
After being demonized by my WW for so long, it really feels good to have someone see me in a good light. I know my friends and my family tell me I'm a good person but this feels different for some reason.
In other news, my friends took me out for dinner for a belated birthday party (I've had 4 bday parties in my honor now). A buddy of mine got me a book that helped him in his D. He wrote a personal note in it. It's awesome to have friends like that.
I have to run and cook my kids something. WW ran out of the house to her OM and left them with store bought chicken, bagels, and popsicles.
