Thank you, Heather. That was a really nice post. I appreciate it.
Ellie, yeah... she is so crazy. She is the most conniving, manipulating, 'victim' you could ever imagine.
She is straight-up evil.
I can't even imagine being that kind of scum-of-the-earth human.
I am sick to my stomach. I don't even know if I want to see the report! It may send me into a rage!
I just want them to disappear from my life! I don't care what they do; I just want them to do it far away from me!
I feel, in a way, angry at myself for giving him any attention at all. I feel like he liked it. I know it did nothing, he didn't hear anything I was saying.
He said I need to let it go. I was trying to express to him that I have let it go. That I'm NOT hanging on to him, but my frustration is her attitude towards the whole thing and how it affects my kids. He did not even want to hear me say that I've let it go. It's like he wants to make it about me wanting him.
He so needs to get over himself. It does make me aware that I need to not give them any attention. I pointed out the fact that I haven't called him or bothered him for anything since July 7, 2014. It was actually before then, but that's the nuke date. I totally left them alone. I never once said a peep to them. Nothing. He texted me all that week asking if I was ok and stuff.... I went totally dark that day.
Of course there was the very minimal interaction in the fall. Very minimal... until he came around. But since February 10, 2015, when I said I have to let him go. That's what I've done and haven't said a peep since (outside of the d14 bday and the one day of texting about the deed, both in February.)
But he totally made it out like I am after him. I stalk her and harass her. I just don't get it. Together they have created this image of who they want me to be to feed their narcissistic ego. I'm not that!
And I realize it was pointless and frustrating... but I kept trying to get that through to him. But he DID NOT want to hear that. He did not want me to interrupt their creation of their idea of who I am. It's so sick.
Clearly he is threatened bc he confided in me how he felt about her. And clearly she is threatened by me bc he came back around here for awhile.
So, as i want nothing to do with either one of them... they are threatened by me. But I don't want that. I just want peace!
Maybe I'm way off base. But it just seems that way. And it seems like the clarity I prayed for. It's what my instincts tell me at this point.
I don't want to look like the crazy one. I don't want to come across as bitter. Again, I just want them to go away from me! Aaaahhhhhh!!!!!!!
She may think she "won" the battle, but honestly the war she is fighting is not with me. I'm not interested.
I think they love the drama.
And xh said i just need to leave her alone. It's frustrating, honestly. I mean... I have left them alone this whole time! I went there ONCE and it was bc of s18. It's not my fault she turns everything into being about her. And she is a victim who needs constant attention and ego massaging.
It's exhausting for me, and I've seen her a total of like, 45 seconds in my whole life.
I can't believe that he denied everything he said. Seriously. Everything. I have never seen anyone try to hard to avoid EVERYTHING the way he did. He couldn't address anything!
And that he is so defensive of her. And she could do no wrong. And all the crap she has pulled on him over the past couple of months... just that I know about... total denial. Robot. Brainwashed. Unreal.
OK...vent over. Smiling now! (Although my insides are still a lil bit on fire.)
