Evan,
There is only one DB law! ... To do something different to break the cycle that causes the rifts. The rest is trial and error. Not having an R-talk is not the cure all. In most cases, R-talk are necessary, but will only work when both parties are receptive to making them productive. Since it is not predictable as to when a WAS is receptive, it is safest to wait for them to initiate such a talk ... but in your sitch if it works for you to bring them up because by doing so makes her receptive, then by all means keep doing what works!
... 180's are first directed to stop what doesn't work, then to experiement in finding what does work draw you closer. In experimenting you may discover what may not work for most works for you. If it works, then keep doing it so long as it continues to work ... and you have to constantly monitor to see it your 180's are still working, because sometime what works is a moving target. What works this week, may not work next week.
So the basis of the 180 is not to get stuck in a pattern where you are doing the same thing over and over, but expecting different results.
