But even if my needs aren't being met I will walk a different path. Pyrite- my DB coach talked to me today and we were talking about my ability to navigate my next R. She said you're not ready for a new relationship when you're ready to trust someone else- you're ready when you trust YOURSELF. When you trust yourself to be able to respond in ways you're proud of, to be the person you want to be. Well, I'm not ready to date because I'm married...but I DO trust myself.
That is fantastic news Zeus. Your DB coach managed to put into words the feeling I get when talking to you. I am glad you trust yourself. What shone through more so to me was that you know who you are, and if you trust that person that is awesome. I am sure that the majority of people out their are not even close to being as self-aware as you are, and more than that mindful of the right direction to move with those things in which are not perfect.
This is great news. I should stop reading now and go to sleep before I get dragged down/drag myself down. Those flashbacks you mentioned - I get them too often. On good days I can deflect them. But not reliably I'm afraid.
In a sense what I affectionately refer to as DBing, is prolonging this. But, I have a friend's Ex who is the embodiment of anti-DBing. 3 years on, pregnant to another man, she is still as angry as a cut snake. I would not be surprised at all if she goes to sleep every night hating him and grinding her teeth. I am grateful for her encouragement to continue.
M: 6 T: 12 Kids: 2,4 BD: Jan 2015 S: Feb 2015 EA/PA confirmed: Feb2015/Mar2015
Your DB coach managed to put into words the feeling I get when talking to you. I am glad you trust yourself. What shone through more so to me was that you know who you are, and if you trust that person that is awesome. I am sure that the majority of people out their are not even close to being as self-aware as you are, and more than that mindful of the right direction to move with those things in which are not perfect. 