Hi Pink. Sorry you down. This is the roller coaster and when your boys are involved then it make it much worse.
If I can chat as a friend for a bit. Your boys are your world and it's clear that your a fantastic mum. The boys are very badly hurt by their dads actions but that can be overcome with time and a contrite H. All you can do for now is be there for them and reassure them that H does love them You can't explain Hs behaviour to them because you don't understand it.
Pink Whenever I talk to my kids about EXW I always keep in my mind that in 10-15 years from now I would want them to look back and see I did nothing to turn them against EXW
In the scheme of your H coming back one day , I have no doubt Pink could forgive H because you are obviously a good person who has compassion and you still love your H very much The boys are going to be lead by you if t/ when this happens and they where raised by you so that compassion and forgiveness is in them too.
I wish I could stop the pain Pink , I really do but its all part of the process and the good news is happiness is also part of the process and that will be there for you at the end
have a good day and I'll be sending you positive thoughts all day. Take care. Rd. xxxx