Zues, congrats on the tournament success. I think it's great that there's something you have such passion about.
You have posted a good deal lately about your next R. What you want, what you fear, how much you want it, that you aren't ready. I think that's all good stuff, and it will come together and sort itself out when you are ready, as long as you aren't using the next R as a painkiller. And I don't think you would, you are very aware of that potential. So relax and let it happen.
I have considered what I want in a future partner, too, and spelled some of it out on my thread. I've had that put to the test this week as I've gotten to know a guy who would like to date me. He is really nice and makes me laugh, but falls short in a couple of specifics. And it makes me re-evaluate my list, is this really what I'm looking for, and why would I reject a really nice guy over that one thing? Is it really that important? I know it's a process I'm going to have to go through.
I think I'm getting ramble, not my usual style, so I'll stop here. Looking forward to more of your thoughts, Zues.
