mlc rut

[pbetra]

Hi 25yrsmlc,

thanks for taking the time to post - I will try to answer all your questions.

re hijacking BF - no worries (don't see it that way just related stuff from other people's sitch that comes up re: my own somehow)

A few questions I have are what are your ages? And are you able to financially support yourself without your h's income?

Am 50 years (like spouse) - am not as marketable as h. some admin work history but primarily homemaker.
personal savings practically used up, the reason why I am happy re assignment & trying with branding as project head is happy with my work so far.

Sounds as if his support has been so erratic, I have to ask you, what's the worst that could realistically happen if he leaves? And, or, if he stays and spends all the money?

I will save money if he leaves - he uses more than what he replaces. using his money, saving by using resources here. Resources I am controlling for me & others as this sitch is not stable.
He is VERY marketable, he will land on his feet somehow - with my age & 'homemaker' work history ???- not so much.

Also, I could not help but notice that despite your growth this past year, 90% of your focus remains on HIS mood and HIS behaviors.
How about not looking at those at all, for a day? And then make it a week? You can always "Check in" to see what he's up to after you do a LOT MORE GAL and you must

This is an excellent idea! I will start today. I have been *caught up way too much ...

We hammer the GAL ... You are NOT detached from him and you can't really detach, imo, without GAL

I know.
*The detach w/love has been tricky 4 me.
Am seeing how I can incorporate some of your GAL suggestions re my sitch more below, which is really quite an impressive list!!

Btw, I don't think labeling it "MLC" is all that helpful b/c in some cases it means the LBSer sticks around with the misguided notion that MLCers always return to the marriages. But They usually do not return.

I get your point re mlc label ... didn't even think of it really . It started with initial high impact sitch & grew habitual. Change is always happening even with us/h, a year has past but here I am still pinning the initial 'high impact-sitch label' after all this time. Have to be mindful moving forward - point taken![/quote]

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* MUST DECLUTTER re improved GAL

I know that some entries have been crytic ...

Know something? will have 2 post this related information to above post soon. Just wanted to answer questions, (hope I did!)
Will reply > re 25yrsmlc 'ps' before I get into 'de cluttering!'
To b contd ...