My STBX exhibited the same behaviors until I told her to not come home on one of her nights out. That brought the A in the open and it also revealed alot of truths to the lies she's been stringing me along with.
My STBX was confused about whether to stay or go but she was not confused about never letting the OM go.
I can tell you that complete detachment has only made my STBX stressed. She is also seeing the OM regularly and overnight.
My path now is to separate. It's the only avenue that I haven't done yet.
