Coming Home

[pbetra]

Am in same sitch mleigh.

I don't know what's going to happen either - or how to handle (??!) anniversary sitch.

Last year h acknowledged it - as a matter of fact, he brought it up & took me out! However, it was strange I think b/c it wasn't real. He was crumbing - we ate, paid bill & returned home. All this while he was smiling & talkative - w/subtle animation, 'artificial'. Dinner talk was pleasant enough but disconnected & 'empty'. I put up a brave front. I was positive as db advised but this was 2 months or so into mlc, so I was really hurting internallly. Very weird when I think back.
(btw For Mother's Day last year - there was no mention of anything just like this year - go figure or maybe NOT!!!)

I have NO expectations re anniversary. He is aware that I am not fooled by crumbing etc b/c of certain incidents that have occured during the past year. It's different if you believe that you're fooling someone so h may view 2015 as 'waste of time.' He may reiterate that he is low on $$ which I know, so this will work out quite conveniently. Who knows?
Will see how it goes ...

I was planning to (casually) dress up a bit, fix my hair even if I just craft away at home or do dishes Doing my feet & nails tomorrow. Something to make me feel good in spite of the past cruelty & neglect, & still feel pretty regardless of increasing wrinkles, & growing sagging skin (unlike the 'fine young things' h has been after!!)

You need to do something to make up for the anniversary. I agree with the above posters. Do something for yourself, a FEEL GOOD ('make up for me') plan, ok?