Seems to me that you're still defensive when it comes to your previous work habits. Something we should know about that? Anything we can do to help you put that away for good? The shame/guilt?
As for the fight. You fell into that trap. Job and Ur are spot on, amigo. I was violently shaking my head in agreement with Job when she said it as a point in time. And with Ur when she mentioned how she's trying to reconcile her life.
Remember how you mentioned she has a lot to work through just like you do? This is part of that, if you ask me.
Learn to let things like this roll off your back. Notice that it's able to affect you as well. You're not a cold frigid monk like you came across.
Cut yourself some slack and regain your perspective, Cali. One fight doesn't end the relationship. In fact, it can be helpful in rebuilding it. Why? Because to build trust you have to test it at certain points.
It's not that you fought, it's how you fought and how you work past it. She has her issues to deal with and you yours and together you have some.
And the crack about the kids etc? Definitely something that is a here and now feeling. i.e. working through those feelings and she would have, I guarantee it because I've been there, had those with or without you in the picture. It's hers, but she has to bring it up and figure out how she feels about it. You happened to be there for the backdrop as much as anything.
I haven't heard how you feel about the 2.5 kids? You've made brief mention of it before, but how about now, Cali? Ever thought about having more kids or are you done with that?
Bounce back and let us know if we can help with the too much working hang up. I have a few ideas on that if you do.
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
