So bit of a backslide lastnight/this morning. W calls we chat a bit and she asks me "Are you happy" I answer honestly ... the honest answer is there are parts of my life I am happy about .. .parts where I am not completely happy. So this starts with her sharing how she wanted more, wanted to work less (This one is new) wanted more children, the house 2.5 kids dog ... that type of thing. Somewhere along the line it was all my fault. We went at it for a bit and then I realized .... she sent me a picture of her cousin who just had a child, looks like this opened the MLC Pandora box. We talked/fought about issues and I am still worked up to a point ... THIS is not what I want, its like the old M where its nothing but her telling me what a failure I am, how I am not this not providing that ... do I want a lifetime of critism ... no thanks. Maybe I was just trying to save the M just to save the M, I dunno. Call it a bad day, things seemed good till all the sudden she realized she hates her job, wants to be a stay at home mom and is currently pulling the "What can Cali do for me" card. I told her I want a R where I am loved regardless of what is in my bank account, treated like a normal person with respect but she is in this strange Monster mode .. its not all anger and spew .. there is a condescending type tone, like I am to blame for her situation for not being the mother of 3 kids, for the job she took on and hates.
Just venting here as I am just so ... ugh
I did backslide and brought up the A and OM ... the anger was there and she kept on attacking like she has been the model wife. I think I am more upset for allowing my buttons to be pressed and the fact I reacted. At this point I feel like I am happier alone, without the drama she constantly brings.
Guess we will see what happens after the dust settles
