It's hard to think that we will ever get to the point of being more detached, but with time, patience, a lot of backsliding, listening and reading the posts of some wise people here and you find yourself doing it.
Iy's hard at first, it feels like you are pushing them away from you, but you start seeing that they become curious and they try to find every single excuse to approach you and find out what you are up to.
It took me a lot of mistakes and pain to figure that GAL and detachment is the only way to make things easier for you and in a way for the R.
I couldn't understand at first and was trying to hold on to the little hope that things between H and I would be resolved in a few weeks, months.
After awhile and a lot of tears, I decide to face that my M as it was has ended. the way I see now is that H is a candidate with advantages. But if we ever get back together, it will be because we will fall in love all over again.
Is it possible? No one knows. But I am doing the things I can do for myself now and it's finally feeling a little better.
I read a lot of 25 posts and posts to others and have been learning with every word she wrote to other people I. This board.
Believe and start training yourself. You will be a better person for yourself, your children and your next R, with your H or someone else.
You are learning and growing, just like I am doing too, and many others here. It's hard at first, but it gets better.
Keep the hard work and believe in yourself. Another lesson I learned was to set my boundaries with my H. It took me a long, long time because I loved that he was still close to me, but that was just postponing the inevitable and creating more pain. I learned after getting my heart broken over and over, then after thinking of my priorities, I decided to take control over my life.
My days are easier now and I am starting feeling proud of myself for my accomplishments. You can do it too girl. Like the wise say here: it is a marathon, not a sprint.
