Originally Posted By: Zues126 on Sunnys thread
Yup, the escape plan.

My STBX wanted to be a stay at home mom. Her mom was a SAHM that raised the kids, then divorced her dad when they were all in school. X-MIL is now single and still very resentful towards her ex. That was STBX's dream as well. She wanted three children and to be able to raise them. The sex stopped after our third child, and now that the youngest is nearing kindergarden age the bomb got dropped. In many ways I don't think she ever expected a life long partnership with me, but wanted my sperm and support while she raised the kids. Now she's ready to cut bait. And her only regret was "she wished she could've made it until the youngest was in school".


Zues this concerns me a great deal. There seem to be so many thinking issues and muddles. From mind reading, destructive (stinking) thinking, past rewriting, and black and white views.

Really!

Considering yourself a sperm donor. These are your children as much as hers! Maybe WW was just an egg donor. Please stop this loop, I know you know better.

I know if you asked her she would say she wanted to make her M work, and that it was a goal of hers. But I really do think that raising the children was a NEED of hers, M was a want, and that's why she stopped investing in the M and was a overachieving mom.

A good M is the best way to bring up children and this takes two parents. Being a good dad is enough of itself.

I said this once long ago and was told I was rewriting history, diagnosing my ex, making excuses when the issue was my mistreatment of her. Truly I'm not interested in doing that. I know our history, I know my actions, and I know what went through her head is irrelevant to what I need to do now.

Whoever said that was wise. I do hope you listened? Well here is your second chance, and maybe there will be a third one........

I just know that I understand the feeling of being played a fool when you thought you were working on something together and the other person had been checked out a long time.

It isn't foolish if you do this for you. Stand for you and your M, it's very brave.


I am so very puzzled by this post Zues, it sounds early Zues before 2x4 action.

V


Last edited by Vanilla; 05/15/15 02:49 AM.
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose.
V 64, WAW