Confused 5

[Joe46]

Well I finally got to talk to a attorney yesterday! I was very relieved. No one else would return my calls or even talk to me about what was going on. This guy listened to what I was dealing with and gave me a couple options. I can either file for divorce or I can file legal separation. Or I can just sit and wait and see if she comes to her senses after being away for awhile. He said that if she moves and I do something later it is a risk because than if we file anything the judges in both states have to hash it out. If I file here than the judge here will decide what is best for the kids. He said that from his experience the judge will not think it is in the best interest for the kids to be taken out of school during the school year for weeks at a time like she was hoping. He said they also will look at how the kids have grown up here and their school is here. So more than likely would set up visitation for the summer and school breaks. So now I have a big decision to make.

So last night I sat W down and asked what her intentions were. I said that I want to know if you want to divorce or separate or what. I have not told her about me talking to lawyer and I am not going to. She said she does not know what she wants. I told her that I am not just going to sit around waiting for her to figure it out. I told her that her getting her own place in California and the way all this has been handled looks like she wants out. Of course the main reason she wants her place is so she can still work without her mom finding out what she does. She told me what she has told D12 about her plans.

So I thought it was time to have my own talk with D12. No surprise that W did not tell her everything. I also found out that D12 has been upset for a long time because she sees what has been happening. Everytime W told her about where she was going to take them, D12 started thinking that she wants me to go also. D12 was really upset last night. I did not say anything bad about W, I just tried to comfort D. I hate seeing my D cry. D is afraid mom and dad are getting a divorce.

So the only thing that I see that I can do is file for legal separation to protect myself. I was hoping that I would not be the one to start the filing process, but I don't want to take any chances with my kids. I am going to give this some thought over the next couple days, so any opinions would be appreciated.