My one problem I am having is when H comes to house in morning to pick up S or when I get home at night sometimes he is still there and he talks etc and then I let this give me hope that maybe he is coming around and I feel like it is causing me a problem with detaching. How can I handle this? Do I just listen and talk until he is ready to leave? This is confusing for me.
H was there last night and he blew leaves off patio and text me later and told me that my gutters were full and he would clean them tomorrow. Is this stuff that I let happen? I want to be self sufficient.
skh ... its tough. You have to be in the mindset of "No Expectations" ... you can be kind, nice and neighborly, usually it helps to cut the conversation off on your terms, you end it, say goodbye, like you have somewhere to be even if you don't ... as if you have a life and you are moving forward with it.
This becomes much easier when you actually are GALing and have things going on in your life. I know for me ... I had plans with my S on M,T and Sun ... Wed I was in a church class, Thursday Softball, Fri night I worked a DJ gig, Saturday mornign rides on the Harley, Saturday night mass, Sunday morning Football .... what free time I had was cooking and cleaning, doing chores .... I was so busy I really had no time for the long chit chats .. I was moving on.
