To Pursue or Not #2

[Arcola]

Tonight I called wife because Ive came to my end of trying to save our marriage. In telling her that I have been trying and didn't know what to do to help us, she responded with her feelings and that she still doesn't feel things can be better between us.

I accepted the fact that this is probably it. So I asked her to tell me truth if she had been seeing/sleeping with anyone since we've been S. At first she didn't want to tell me and prior to telling me gave me reasons that were to sugarcoat the fact or to make the impact less powerful. So after expressing her feelings and acknowledging that she was seeing someone, she told me that they had slept together.

I'm over my crying as I type this, but it hurt to finally hear from her mouth my suspicions. I hope that it gives me closure and helps me on my way of whatever my future is.

I know I tried to save our marriage and may not have done the best I could. But it helps me to know I did try. I can't quite pinpoint a feeling for knowing I'm at this point in my journey, but I didn't expect or want to see myself make it to this point. Others' threads I've came across that just ended or abruptly ended (older DBers prior 2015) I always wondered was it truly their end or if anything changed despite them no longer being on the boards. So like I said I can't pinpoint a feeling, but this will probably be the last post and if not last, signify the end of my DB journey.

I know now all I can do is look after me and ensure my children are taken care of.