Heavy .. Wonka is right on this .. infact I think it was he who opened my eyes about the A-hole Husband Zone
Here is the thing, its only a window .. not a door .. keep that expectation thing in perspective and just as Wonka mentioned .. consider it a baby step, something to put in your hat knowing you are making progress. Like all things .. consistency, keep up this non-judgemental approach, unconditional, steady PMA .... you will have days when its frustrating but looking back this was key for me ... by no means am I waving a victory flag here, but I am so much closer to the 'goal' than I was and doing what you are doing was a big part of it.
Kill em with kindness is pretty much the motto, at first I did it because in a evil way it bugged her and that alone made me smile .. then it just became who I wanted to be, who I was before all this.
