Wayward Wife and LRT Part 3

[Defacto]

What advice would u give with moving out and having us in separate places? What all seems to be helping and things to prepare for?

Rip,
My STBX moved out so I can't help with the logistics or legality of that unfortunately.

Good advice above from Mahhhty.

What's helped me deal with the mess of everything is thought stopping and GAL'ing. Whenever big bad thoughts start creeping in, I just tell myself that I can use this time for self reflection, self improvement, and self discovery. I try to exercise every day, go out with friends a couple times a week, volunteer, read self help books, go for lunch time hikes, started going to a church that I always wanted to go to, go to concerts, joined an existing discussion group, and started my own discussion group. When I have the kids, I try to plan fun and memorable things for us to do. I have also updated my wardrobe to make sure I'm always looking my best. Basically, I have tried to capitalize on the gift of time that STBX has given me. This has translated into a calmness and confidence, where I know I will be okay no matter what transpires.

I would prepare you for your W initially missing you. I know it will be hard, but take this in stride and don't let this impact your detachment, LRT, etc. Prepare to be lonely at first, but I am usually able to distract myself with chores around the house.

For a funny, yet sadly true, take on our newfound freedom and independence, check out the lyrics to Wilco's "Hate It Here."

"I try to stay busy
I do the dishes, I mow the lawn
I try to keep myself occupied
Even though I know you're not coming home

I try to keep the house nice and neat
I make my bed I change the sheets
I even learned how to use the washing machine
But keeping things clean doesn't change anything

What am I gonna do when I run out of shirts to fold?
What am I gonna do when I run out of lawn to mow?
What am I gonna do if you never come home?
Tell me, what am I gonna do?

I hate it
I hate it here
When you're gone

I caught myself thinking
I caught myself thinking once again
Have to try to keep my mind out of this
Try not to pretend

I'll check the phone
I'll check the mail
I'll check the phone again and I call your mom
She says you're not there and I should take care

I hate it here
When you're gone
I hate it
I hate it here
When you're gone

I try to stay busy
I take out the trash, I sweep the floor
Try to keep myself occupied
Cause I know you don't live here anymore"