I do get where your coming from but you are early in the stages of this looking at others sitchs.
I know what you mean about your heart hardening but is it really or are you just tired of the percived actions of H ?
For example , the tyre episode , when I first read that I was appalled , I could t belive that he didn't come back to change the tyre for you , then you posted you drove to the garage ! !!!! So tyre wasn't flat but low If you H got the impression it was low and not flat then I understand his attitude.
RD, I no longer feel like I'm new at this, BD was over a year ago. And there really hasn't been any hope whatsoever during that year. No crying, no I'm miserable, no I'm willing to try, no anything other than the ice cube he's always been.
It's not that I need his help, it's that I want to know I'm important to him. The tire was low, not flat, I didn't need his help driving to the station. We both understood that. What I desperately wanted, though, is a follow up phone call or text asking if I'd made it OK and if they got it fixed. I didn't receive that. Same thing with the 700 mile drive and with the leg procedure. I don't need his assistance with those, I wanted his concern. I wanted five minutes of his day to make sure I'm OK. I got it from my friends, it's not an unreasonable request. Except when the other person just doesn't care. And you are correct that I don't know what he's thinking. But if he's secretly really concerned with my wellbeing and just not saying anything, well, then, that doesn't do me any good.
Originally Posted By: Maybell
Sunny, I'm sorry if you felt pressured by me. It's not so much that I thought you should divorce, as that I felt like it hadn't all sunk in on you what he had done.
MB, I never felt like you were pressuring me or judging me in any way, I just sometimes felt like you didn't understand that I was content with the way things were. Not happy with them, but willing to let them be for a while. But I always understood that you were speaking from experience and concern, so it was all good.
