I think for most of us LBS's we feel like we're in the furthest place from the driver's seat with that decision.
I certainly understand how you feel as I have been where you are, I do not think there is a specific thread that says this. It is my observation, and research that leads me to give out that advice. I do believe that the LBS is the one that gets to decide, as I have written on some other threads many times the LBS becomes the WAS and everything becomes flipped.
I think maybe it comes down to a boundary that finally is enforced, and the LBS finally dropping the rope and Letting Go. At that point the WAS has no one else to blame other than themselves and maybe at that point decides to start to make changes to FIX themselves. For all along it was never about the marriage or the relationship but something that was missing within themselves. I am not saying that each person in the marriage is not responsible for 50%. The LBS thinks they have no choice, when in fact they have 50% of the choice.
