Alpha Step At A Time #5

[alpha99]

In the continuing saga that is my W messing me about, she has texted today to ask if I wanted the kids overnight later in the week on a day when I normally wouldn't. I've already made plans and said I couldn't. What followed was a narky text full of criticism, essentially bemoaning the fact that I don't jump when W clicks her fingers. What she fails to realise is that I know her parents are away this week and so she is feeling the full force of having the children more than normal. Well, these are the arrangements that she wanted so she'll have to deal with it. I still see them in one way or another on five days of the week, so I'm doing my share of parenting.

At times like this it is so frustrating. However people feel about me saying it, everyone with half a brain that we know would agree that I am by far the better parent. As W attempts to dictate terms and conditions on where, when, how I see my children, I am gradually reaching the point, now that my initial shock and sadness at things is long over, of considering legal action to shut her up and have my children with me. She is funding her life based on the benefits that she receives for the children, and from what I see not really using said benefit money for the purposes of the children.


It's not the case that she is working hard and doesn't have time for them. She's reduced her work under the guise of spending more time with them, but the children say they just play on computer games and are left in their room to play alone, haven't been the park etc, and spend a lot of time at their grandparents. When I returned them to her at the weekend I had to bang hard on the door as she was still in bed even though she knew the children were due back at that time.

All in all her freedom appears to have allowed her to be as stupid as she likes. I did keep that kind of stuff in check when we were together. I'm not absolving myself of past responsibility for things but at the same time when I clearly the more educated/interested in organising things then of course it fell on me to manage things. It's becoming increasingly clear she is struggling to manage anything at all (disciplinary trouble at work, not completing on going work training, poor financial management, not managing house sale/divorce at all, so on and etc).

I've taken a back seat to this point over joint decisions about the house etc as up until recently I was hoping that we wouldn't go through with a sale and that things would work out. That isn't going to happen and so I think I'm going to have to drive this process along now.

I do feel lonely at times, particularly in the evenings when there is nothing to do, but I'd much rather be alone than back with someone who acts/thinks like a child. Once again, the children are a big consideration of mine, but should someone else come along, and I'm not actively seeking that but it's happened once recently with my few dates so I guess it's a possibility, then I would be open to seeing what happens.