Hi OD, sorry you're having a rough day & hope your back is all better soon. Good for you going to Jujitsu and the Coda meeting. Will you go again do you think??

In terms of interactions with your W. I know it's hard, but does it help to try and see stuff like this as a business transaction and respond in that vein? If you take the emotion out of the response and it was a work thing, how would you respond then?

In terms of 1, it sounds as though you're happy with selling. But, I would at least arrange some free consultations with L's before you confirm to your W. Normally the advice is to only sell your main home if it is part of a full financial settlement. Your W says she's not about to screw you over financially, but believe nothing that is said and take reasonable steps to protect your interests without being aggressive about it. I just told my H that I didn't feel able to make big decisions like that without some advice.

For your S's birthday, it sounds as though you know what you want to do, and presume you'll make some nice separate plans with him.

Sounds like you are happy with three.

For four - why not just respond, yes I'll want some time with them. I need to firm up plans & will come back to you, then talk to your Mum. If she decides to go on holiday with OM, there's not much you can do about that, and best to just let go of stuff like that. Our WAS's feel no loyalty to us or the M right now and - horrible though it is - it's not something we can control...

Hope this helps OD, and hope tomorrow is a better day for you. ((OD))

T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus