Have you thought about removing yourself from the friend zone? You seem to be a good friend to your W. Yes you don't reply to some texts and don't answer some calls but from what I can read here you're overly friendly.
A WAW in an active A is not going to be attracted to an H that knows she is engaging with OM and still playing house.
Who is the man she was attracted to? Let her miss you. Let her wonder what you're doing. She may act out more as a result of this initially but I think you need some boundaries. Does W need to be calling you just to chat on non financial or kid related issues? Do you want to be her best friend or her husband?
T, Thanks so much for your response!
I agree that I have made an effort to be establish a connection with STBX in the last few weeks. My reasoning was that I had already played the stoic, somewhat aloof H who was happy either way. I thought that if the A was winding down in some fashion, it would be important for STBX to feel some type of emotional connection with me going forward. I haven't been pursuing, just trying to maximize each interaction, no matter how inconsequential.
However, I admit that I could feel STBX moving me to the friend zone a bit and this has troubled me some. The problem is I'm not entirely sure what to do about this. In the last 24 hours, I have received feedback to strategically pursue OR keep doing what I'm doing OR essentially go dark. All of these approaches have their merits. I'm just struggling with choosing one that fits my sitch.
What's some advice for moving STBX away from the friend zone?
Me:35 W:30 D:4 S:1 Bomb: 01/08/15, discovered EA & PA In House Separation: 01/14/15 W moves out: 04/05/15 I tell OM's W about A: 04/15/15 W serves D papers: 06/19/15 Mediation: 09/16/15 D final: 12/01/15
