new here.... burned out.

[Zues126]

Have you read the 37 rules? The answer is pretty clearly stated. I would tell you but I want to make sure you have read them all and understand their significance.

Also, your comment about baby steps isn't really correct. See, you are in a cycle in which you try to get closer together, then you feel a lot of pain due to the discord in your interactions, then you pull apart again and feel rejected/lonely/dissatisfied/hurt, then you long to reconnect so you start reaching out again. This is the cycle you BOTH are in.

So as that cycle repeats again and again it isn't really correct to say "we are making baby steps" when in reality this is just another loop around the same race track. And there is a limited number of times before one or both of you conclude that the negative outcomes you are getting are the only possible outcomes from your interactions, and "I guess we just aren't a fit for each other, and we aren't meant to be M".

I understand you don't have your own money and can't ask H. Let me be more direct- are you telling me you don't have a friend in this world that will spring you a few hundred dollars for 3 divorce coaching sessions at this time in crisis? Which is more important, your discomfort asking for help or your M?