I just want to make sure I am understanding all of this correctly.
Even at the best of times your H was paranoid and controlling?
You are responsible for all child care and home care. But he has time for kickball leagues, Xbox and phone games. And he controls all finances and keeps an iron grip on them?
And he gets upset if the house isn't a showplace or there's no home cooked meal in the fridge?
He refuses to consider any counseling?
And you are somewhat isolated with no potential help except his family?
YBT - I am not someone who uses salty language but f*** that. Seriously.
I have to ask in all seriousness - are you afraid of him?
You make some money with your side gig? Open up your own bank account - deposit your money in it and use it to pay for a babysitter and get yourself some counselling. You don't need to live like you need his permission for everything in your life - because you don't.
