Mozza (12) + Links to success stories

[Mozza]

Again, I'm pleased that my last thread has lasted longer than ever. It is one of my objective to focus less on my sitch and more on my life. Time goes by faster when I do and I believe time is on my side.

I come every day but I spend less time here, so I'm less aware of the success stories. I'm still willing to gather them at the top of my next threads, so I would be very grateful if some of you might want to come and add the ones that they identify around the forums, whether they be piecing, reconciliation or letting go.

I regularly search for "Mozza" to see if I'm mentioned, so I won't miss your posts when you refer to me.

-------------------

Detachment report | My W called me tonight. This was a first in 2015. We don't talk. We text and email as short as possible and only about mandatory stuff for the kids — we wouldn't even tell each other if a kid gets sick. I was worried because in the past she tried to corner me or make big announcements. Did she lose her job? Break up? Wanted to restart the D papers? It turns out that she has a health scare. Right now, it's still very early and no tests have concluded that she's sick, but her doctors have run more tests and the results will come in in a few weeks. If she's sick, it won't be life threatening or even life altering, as far as I can tell at the moment. Her condition might worsen though and it's never good to be sick. I don't know why she called and neither does she. She said "So I wanted you to know because... because... well, I thought you should know." My mindreading theory is that she still turns to me every time there is something about her safety. A month or two ago, she texted me that there was a house fire... a quarter mile from her place.

I didn't quite know how to react. On the one hand, my reflex was to show compassion, even though she doesn't have negative results at the moment. On the other hand, I'm in no mood to provide H-type support. She left me proudly saying that she didn't want my support anymore and I don't want her to have her cake and eat it. I think I walked the line, told her it was worrisome indeed, and to keep me posted.

PMA report | Still crying almost every day. It feels like I've been on a plateau. Sometimes I can cry at the strangest things, but I think I've identified a thread: love and care. When I hear or see something that suggests someone really cares for another, it sets off the flood. Maybe by my fault, but my WW didn't care much about me for several months before BD and it hurt me greatly at the time.

Flirting report | I went to get a facial and a massage yesterday (metrosexual all the way!) and got into a talk with the woman, who's about my age. It was mentioned that I'm separated and that she's single and looking. She was also quite attractive. I thought I should invite her for a coffee, but I couldn't find the nerve. It just felt awkward to go down that road after she had touched me so much. Still, I'm always disappointed when I don't muster the nerve to ask for what I want, for fear of rejection or awkwardness.

-------------

Everyone who wrote since my last post: thank you! I will get to it. I just spent 90 minutes on my new thread and this post, so now I need to clean the kitchen and prepare tomorrow!