KGirl - letting the past go

[KGirl]

Thank you, all, for your kind words my friends and colleagues have sent me a lot of messages too, and it's nice to have so much support.

Well, it's official. We are D. The hearing itself only took about 10 minutes, pretty straightforward. The beforehand parts were annoying just having to interact w/ H, it didn't really help matters. Some of those gems include:

H: So how early did you get to the appointment at the lawyer's (he arrived at exactly 12:30, for a 12:30 appointment)
Me: About 12:20.
H: *starts laughing out loud* oh I thought for SURE you'd be there at like noon. You always have to be so early for everything.

ooook.... and then

H: There's a piece of hair hanging in your face... it needs to be cut. I wish I had a scissors so I can cut it. It's so annoying, you always have those!
Me: Well, lucky for you you'll never have to see it again *storms away while walking on a busy street and runs to the nearest Starbucks, crying*

H: Are you going back to work after this?
Me: No
H: Oh, well hopefully you're not doing what I'm doing.. I'm gonna go see Age of Ultron.
Me: Nope, I definitely will not be doing that.

WTF, because that's the first thing I would do after my D hearing? Go see a movie? OK.

I have today and tomorrow off so today I think I'm going to just mope. I got a couple things done (requested a new social security card, deposited my big old property settlement check!) and that was hard enough. The bank teller asked me how my day was so far and I starting tearing up. Then he said something fairly wise when I commented that the weather was crappy and rainy all day: "Well, it's good for that to happen, because it helps us appreciate the better days." True, true. I got myself some sushi, wine, and smoked salmon dip, so I'm just going to hunker down with that and some TV and just let the tears happen when they happen. Maybe pull out my wedding box and take a last look at some of those things, and then put it away. I'm not ready to throw that stuff away and don't know if I'll ever be able to, but it deserves another look before it gets put away indefinitely. Tomorrow, hopefully I can use my time to do some things - go to the DMV and request a new license, change some name things online, maybe go buy some plants for my patio.

I also took a week off at the end of March to maybe go to Vegas, pending I have all of the proper identification to buy a plane ticket..! We'll see. I'm co-hosting a bridal shower immediately when I'd get back and I'm hesitant to go in case there's things to prepare but the bride-to-be says she is low maintenance and I should totally go on the trip and all will be well. It probably will be fine, I don't have to cook anything, just plan the games and favors!