Thanks for the update KGirl. You know I always appreciate them.
My IC suggests that sometimes we're overly sad because we're confronted with our fears in this new life. I know it makes some sense in my stich. I note that the car incident is making you doubt your capacity to be independent in a way, and that the fear of being alone is on your mind at the same time.
I'm glad you're getting to a balanced view of what lead to the D. Know of course that his reasons will never be exactly yours, so you have to accept that it won't make complete sense, that you wouldn't have made the same decision under the same circumstances. But most importantly, we LBS might be tempted to demonize our WAS to make us feel better, at the risk of missing out on some lessons. Hopefully we can all see the Matrix behind it all.
M39 D6 D3 (at S) S 2014-09 D 2016-09
"You can't start a fire sitting around, crying over a broken heart" - Bruce Springsteen.
Well, today's the day... final hearing is in a few hours. One stop to make at STBX's lawyer's office to sign some paperwork related to the house, then on to the courthouse. Very emotional this morning with the finality of it all, and it was easy to forget about/put aside when I didn't have to actively do anything. Now I have to stand in front of people and agree to my marriage being irretrievably broken (I mean, I could say no, but that will just cause more grief and questions, it's not really worth it - they'll grant it anyways as long as he says yes).
I did ponder what I'd do if suddenly he changed his mind or had second thoughts. I think I'd want to still move forward so we aren't tied to each other financially, and we could consider dating after that point. That way I wouldn't feel obligated to make a go of it with him again if it really wasn't right for me. But, I kinda doubt that will happen anyway.
Me:30 H:29, no kids T:12, M:4 (when D was final) 12/13: "Don't think I want to be M anymore" 6/14: Separated (I move) 1/15: H filed for D 5/15: D final
