I know there are no guarantees but.....

[Mozza]

It took her as long as it's taking you to detach, except she did it under your nose. Don't start counting in October, start counting much before that. And of course she's happy and moving on now right now (maybe less than it appears, but still). The only way that DB works is that later down the road she will realize what she's done and regret it. Maybe. But there's no guarantee. The only guarantee of results is the work you will do on yourself. What are you doing, now, to become a man only a fool would leave? That's your task now if you want to give your M a chance tomorrow.

And speaking of vows, what did it mean to you: "I promise to cherish, to love, and to worship"? Yes, she went too far, but don't be too self-righteous about it. Remember your part of the failings because that's what you can work on now.

Get over the fact that you are already divorced. Nobody here has made any mention that it's too late, except you. Cadet has repeated a few times that it's not over until you decide it is. Everybody who comes here for help gets it no matter what. We have people who were never married, some who were on poly-amorous relationships, etc.

Also, there are tens of people here and everybody is a volunteer, many still in the midst of the suffering. You are extremely lucky with all the attention you got so far. Many haven't been so lucky and some have been here for months without even input from the vets. Keep posting, and be grateful when anyone takes the time to respond. If no one comes, keep posting. Also, over time, start posting some support to others. This is a mutual support group.

I would encourage you to write shorter too. It makes it easier for people to follow your story. You an add details based on people's questions for instance.

Hang in there. We know it's not easy. How well we know.