gan 6 - return to human be-ing

[Zues126]

Agreed. I'm not up to a 25km. I'm working on getting off the couch some days.

Oh, below is an excerpt from a post on JB's thread. It was just something that helped explain the feelings a bit better. The idea was that rejecting sex consistently and basically telling me "sex isn't all a M is about, it's something to do when we both feel like it to enjoy together, you wouldn't want me to go through the motions, let's work on our R and I'm sure we'll have sex someday"...well, that was her half of what ended the M. I'm working on my half. Thanks Gan.


"I feel like my desires are so strong I am ashamed of them...and because of that I feel like I am damaged goods that no woman would want...

I don't want to be with every woman I see. What I really want is to be with one woman who can understand how much desire is in my heart day to day, and who can still accept me regardless. And that she would show me that by talking about it with me, acknowledging it, and still making it a priority to take care of my needs (in ways that were agreeable to her).

The point is it really isn't about how much sex, or how often. What I yearn for is someone to understand the depths of my desire, and still love me. In fact, I often long for someone that will actually appreciate the fact that I will pledge eternal loyalty, monogamy, and devotion to just her. Think about it...all day long, hundreds of times a day, I have overwhelming desire...and I let it go, stuff it, put it away, deny it...all with the hopes that I can share that with my partner and turn to only her. And that in return I will do everything I can to understand her needs, accept her irregularities (if I'm irregular), and reciprocate to the best of my ability."