Your moving forward. I know it seems frustratingly slow. From my perspective now looking back at BD 5 + years ago, I think our souls lead us through at the pace we need to go.
I remember in my MLC talking to one of the people I was supposed to meet who had an MLC himself. His therapist told him to give the melancholy moments in your life your utmost attention and then let it go, because they will come along frequently in the beginning and less so as you get through your journey.
Keep looking for the silver linings this unasked for journey deals you.