Informal Poll: Onset of MLC

[pbetra]

Employment / Financial stress, growing debt.
(then Milestone birthday & "sitch is same" - had expected "better by then". Add illness of close, aging relative to the mix ... kaboom)

LoisB's sounds a bit like mine re h's job sitch. Working hard, "was making other people rich, & where did it get him?"

My own h was not able to handle the illness of aging relative. With so much around me I did not understand the true urgency of his sitch or (the deep level) of his desperation.

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With time & growing knowedge more things make sense as they become understandable. However, at the time, the serious nature & depth of all this psychological stuff was not recognized for how critical it really was (didn't really know very much about mlc!!).

An introspective demeanor, or bad moods seem 'logical' by way of deduction, given the circumstances or someone's bad luck (although not acceptable or good of course). They are not expected to be bubbling over with joy anyway. We, the onlookers know life is hard, we empathize - we understand that anger or depression is a result of challenging problems.

The point is most of us cannot make that initial connection from what seems to be behaviour arising from a bad sitch, to that 'deep down' crisis aching to get out, after years of apparent suppression (& no meaningful validation). How could we?!! The average person is not schooled that way - & often learn when it is 'late in the day' ... ie when it has already occured. This gives us new eyes ... & then we can connect 'some' of the dots. The learning continues ...