I get the compare thing ... I do .. I think we all do it looking for tips and tricks in others sitches. Thing is, and I even discussed this some with the W, we were talking about the A and the imapact the STD will have on the "what if" premise that we patch up our marriage. She was emotional and I said it could be worse, she did not see how, I explained she could have become pregnant. Its like she did not even consider that to be a possible result. Then she remarked "what if I was?" ... I told her bluntly and honestly that would have been a deal breaker for me, bad enough the STD is there for life as a reminder ... no way could I help raise a child or be around that .... that is where YOU are much stronger than I Mighty ... I could not have even considered it.
This MLC thing is just so cruel ... it is. And you have one who has yet to hit rock bottom, he did a serious touch and go on you and to be honest its not fair .... no one would wish this upon anybody. And yeah ... there is nothing I did, other than work on me ... truth is I still do not trust it, when it appeared she might be poking out I thought of your sitch, and I am still guarded and taking things extremely slowly. They are going to stay in the tunnel until it becomes unbearable, as bad as it is for us ... I think its 100x worse for them, I truly believe that.
Would you rather be in your shoes .. or his at this moment? Not to feel sorry for the guy, he made his choices and his bed and will have to deal with it for the rest of his life .. just as my W has ... but WE have the choice and the power to do with our lives whatever we would like. You can be as happy as you want knowing you did all you could ... there is peace in that.
