So I'm getting mixed messages and not sure how to keep from getting sucked into talking about the relationship and reacting to OM
On Tues my H had to visit his lawyer (some inlaw fighting over caregiving issues with the parents) out of the blue he texted me
"i'm sorry i have gotten us in this bad spot U r best person I have ever known Loved me in spite of flaws U have treated me better than anyone"
Not sure how to respond I said "still love you. Its tough. Thats what love is good and bad"
A couple of hours later he texts me again to see if I wanted to buy the lawyers season tickets to my alma mater for football and baseball. 6 months ago i would have jumped at the thought of this but I didnt even have an answer.
I ignored the message and he called me a little while later. After asking me why i sound so sad he broached the tickets again. He said it would be a good family activity. I said I don't know and he said you mean because of the affair? Then said, "well she went to school there too maybe she would like to go. Then he said sorry bad joke that would be awkward.
Fast forward to that evening. Called him because his work sent over dinner as a sympathy gesture. Turns out he was with the OW. He came home later and we talked about our situation he said he regretted all the hateful things he said about me it's not my fault. I'm his best friend and we have built so much over the past 22 years and he is ripped right down the middle because I can't give him the taboo and excitement of a new partner
He left Wednesday morning for a work trip. I do confess to sending a bitchy text about my daughter not needing his help anymore so he could go to the Bahamas with the OW guilt free. He texted back "OK thank you" stupid I know..not sure if that means he thinks its really ok with me and he is going or he was distracted and not paying attention
So I vowed not to call or text again. He called Wed night and we had brief talk. I stayed dark all day Thursday and went out to dinner with work clients. He called my cell at 830, then home, then the boys who told him I was out. so he texted me
"hey going out. Talk later. boys said u were out. Have fun be safe"
I didnt answer and at 11:00 pm he sent "U oK" so I said "yes of course" and told him he had gotten a letter from the lawyer. Havent heard from him since.
So sorry for the long post but he will be home tonight Friday and I don't know how to act. I am anticipating him being tired tonight then wanting to go work on his garden on Saturday then being with the OW from Sunday afternoon until sometime Monday afternoon. Am I distant, friendly. Do I suggest trying to do something fun on Saturday?
