I think your intended reply is very good - he already knows it's not what you want - no need to belabor the point. As for it being from the heart - you're a smart lady and I think you know you could pen a Shakespearean sonnet right now and it wouldn't have any effect on him in his condition.
I know you love him, that's obvious from your posts, but he sure sounds like a mess right now. Sometimes I read threads and really think the WAS is a jerk and wish the LBS would see it. In your case, I just feel sad for your H. Whatever he's gong through, it is obviously costing him something that was very worth having. He's made his choice to go through all of this without you. Who knows if this is really the end or where he will be years from now? For the present, I would just focus on resolving the practicalities in a way that works for you.
